28.12.2007, 19:06
So, ein neuer Teil.
Danke fuer das tolle FB, und dann gleich von vier Leuten
xD
re-FB:
@Jules: You're lost for words... How could that happen, huh? Danke,fuer dein FB und ich versuche nie dich umzubringen.
@Anna: Danke auch an dich, dass du FB gibst! Ich hoffe du hattest auch ein merry merry christmas. Please stay tuned.
@Anne:Thanks a lot! your Fb means a lot, I hope you stay tuned.
@Ramona: Well, life's not fair xD Aber danke, dass du auch hier FB gibst. Freut mich sehr!
PART 2
Sense. What is sense? Find a target, live your dream. Itâs all about finding your sense in life. But what is the sense? Or better what makes sense? Go to work. That does. Look after your kids. That makes sense. Me sitting on my bed, crying. That doesnât. You not being here by my side to console me. That doesnât make sense.
Itâs been two months now. And still, I canât believe it. I tried to move on with my life. But somehow I havenât been able to. I went to work but in any room I saw something that you touched, that you repaired. I went shopping to distract myself. But even a brand-new âI hate President Bushâ T-Shirt couldnât light up my mood. I tried to talk to my friends, family. But theyâre sad, too. They donât know any words of consolation. But I feel that nobody is just as sad as I am.
There are times, when my body shakes with grief, when my eyes just canât let out one single tear because there are just none left. My daughter said I should do exactly that. Mourn. But she starts getting worried about me because I refuse to talk. Not just to her. I donât talk at all. And if you knew me, that fact would really freak you out.
So Iâm sitting here in the living-room, looking around. And suddenly I kind of know what to do. I get up and go to the cupboard and pick up your wallet. In between some dollars I find exactly what Iâm looking for.
The magic horoscope. I remember the first time we met. But that memory slowly gets suppressed by our first date. It had been the best date, Iâve ever had. It took us eight years to finally get there. When I think about it now⦠what a waste of time. These eight years. All the time we would have had together. But I was turning from one man to another, without realizing that you were there the whole time. I just never realized that every relationship I had, broke apart because of you. I hardly am able to explain it. But in the back of my mind, I always compared the guys to you, just to find out that nobody, nothing ever compares to you. Nothing at all.
I pull out a box and put the horoscope into it. A few inches besides your wallet lies a small piece of paper. Itâs a card from T.J.âs brother. He gave it to you on Lizâ wedding. Our first date. Unofficial. But yet, our first date. We enjoyed the hell out of ourselves that day. The ceremony itself was kind of a laugh but in the end it was romantic. But the best was yet to come. As the first tunes of Sam Phillipsâ âReflecting Lightâ reached out into that warm summerâs night, you asked me to dance. I have to admit you really surprised me. I didnât think that you could waltz like that. We started out like two high school kids, barely touching each other. But as the song went on, we magically moved closer together. For the first time, touching, feeling each other.
It had been our first moment. And so many were about to come. So many, but yet they werenât enough. I wanted to grow old with you. And now Iâm getting old and youâre not. Youâre just not. I know I have been told that every end has a beginning but this oneâs all wrong. This oneâs just so wrong. I slowly sink down to the ground now, putting the card into the box. Tears once again begin to roll down my cheeks. But still no sound leaves my mouth.
My life is like a one way street, when all I wanna do is to go back. In time especially. How I wish that it could still be November. How I wish I said âI love youâ before you hung up the phone. Just before somebody told me you werenât coming home.
I take a deep breath, wipe away my tears and stand up again. I turn around and reach out for a little golden badge lying on top of the TV. In black color there is engraved a large 7. It is the original sign for Room 7 at the DragonFly. The first visitor in that room had been you. Pictures of the test-run become shape in front of my inner eye. The terrible fight we had before I finally realized you were the one for me. That there actually was a moment. Then the words made their way out of your mouth.
Would you just stand still? Those words echo in my ears now.
You slowly move closer to me. I can hear your breath becoming faster. Then finally I can feel your lips on mine and everything around me isnât important anymore. Just you and me. My stomach feels weird. Butterflies, I believe. Iâm the happiest person in the world but thenâ¦
I taste salt. First, Iâm confused, why would your lips taste like salt? But then I can feel tears. My tears. I open my eyes and youâre not here anymore. Just vanished.
I get hold onto myself and throw the golden seven into the box. I walk to the sofa and sit down.
Trying to adjust to a world that just wonât stop turning.
Danke fuer das tolle FB, und dann gleich von vier Leuten
xDre-FB:
@Jules: You're lost for words... How could that happen, huh? Danke,fuer dein FB und ich versuche nie dich umzubringen.
@Anna: Danke auch an dich, dass du FB gibst! Ich hoffe du hattest auch ein merry merry christmas. Please stay tuned.
@Anne:Thanks a lot! your Fb means a lot, I hope you stay tuned.
@Ramona: Well, life's not fair xD Aber danke, dass du auch hier FB gibst. Freut mich sehr!
PART 2
Sense. What is sense? Find a target, live your dream. Itâs all about finding your sense in life. But what is the sense? Or better what makes sense? Go to work. That does. Look after your kids. That makes sense. Me sitting on my bed, crying. That doesnât. You not being here by my side to console me. That doesnât make sense.
Itâs been two months now. And still, I canât believe it. I tried to move on with my life. But somehow I havenât been able to. I went to work but in any room I saw something that you touched, that you repaired. I went shopping to distract myself. But even a brand-new âI hate President Bushâ T-Shirt couldnât light up my mood. I tried to talk to my friends, family. But theyâre sad, too. They donât know any words of consolation. But I feel that nobody is just as sad as I am.
There are times, when my body shakes with grief, when my eyes just canât let out one single tear because there are just none left. My daughter said I should do exactly that. Mourn. But she starts getting worried about me because I refuse to talk. Not just to her. I donât talk at all. And if you knew me, that fact would really freak you out.
So Iâm sitting here in the living-room, looking around. And suddenly I kind of know what to do. I get up and go to the cupboard and pick up your wallet. In between some dollars I find exactly what Iâm looking for.
The magic horoscope. I remember the first time we met. But that memory slowly gets suppressed by our first date. It had been the best date, Iâve ever had. It took us eight years to finally get there. When I think about it now⦠what a waste of time. These eight years. All the time we would have had together. But I was turning from one man to another, without realizing that you were there the whole time. I just never realized that every relationship I had, broke apart because of you. I hardly am able to explain it. But in the back of my mind, I always compared the guys to you, just to find out that nobody, nothing ever compares to you. Nothing at all.
I pull out a box and put the horoscope into it. A few inches besides your wallet lies a small piece of paper. Itâs a card from T.J.âs brother. He gave it to you on Lizâ wedding. Our first date. Unofficial. But yet, our first date. We enjoyed the hell out of ourselves that day. The ceremony itself was kind of a laugh but in the end it was romantic. But the best was yet to come. As the first tunes of Sam Phillipsâ âReflecting Lightâ reached out into that warm summerâs night, you asked me to dance. I have to admit you really surprised me. I didnât think that you could waltz like that. We started out like two high school kids, barely touching each other. But as the song went on, we magically moved closer together. For the first time, touching, feeling each other.
It had been our first moment. And so many were about to come. So many, but yet they werenât enough. I wanted to grow old with you. And now Iâm getting old and youâre not. Youâre just not. I know I have been told that every end has a beginning but this oneâs all wrong. This oneâs just so wrong. I slowly sink down to the ground now, putting the card into the box. Tears once again begin to roll down my cheeks. But still no sound leaves my mouth.
My life is like a one way street, when all I wanna do is to go back. In time especially. How I wish that it could still be November. How I wish I said âI love youâ before you hung up the phone. Just before somebody told me you werenât coming home.
I take a deep breath, wipe away my tears and stand up again. I turn around and reach out for a little golden badge lying on top of the TV. In black color there is engraved a large 7. It is the original sign for Room 7 at the DragonFly. The first visitor in that room had been you. Pictures of the test-run become shape in front of my inner eye. The terrible fight we had before I finally realized you were the one for me. That there actually was a moment. Then the words made their way out of your mouth.
Would you just stand still? Those words echo in my ears now.
You slowly move closer to me. I can hear your breath becoming faster. Then finally I can feel your lips on mine and everything around me isnât important anymore. Just you and me. My stomach feels weird. Butterflies, I believe. Iâm the happiest person in the world but thenâ¦
I taste salt. First, Iâm confused, why would your lips taste like salt? But then I can feel tears. My tears. I open my eyes and youâre not here anymore. Just vanished.
I get hold onto myself and throw the golden seven into the box. I walk to the sofa and sit down.
Trying to adjust to a world that just wonât stop turning.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]