[Purzelbaer]

Hi meine Süßen!
Gott, so lnagsam aber sicher holt ihr auf.

@eve94 - Tja, Rory war in der Hinsicht doch schon immer ein bissel langsam, oder? Ich sag ja nur Tristan ... oder Jess ...

@RoGirl - Hast du das Klebeband? Sonst fällst du mir noch hin Keine Ursache. Auf das Kapitel musst du noch ein bisschen warten, aber es kommt bald.

@Steffi - Ich freu mich, dass dir meine Flashbacks so gefallen. Im kommenden Teil ist zwar keins, aber es ist trotzdem ... (Adjektiv darfst du dann selber einfügen )

@Anja - Ist aber lieb von dir, dass du mich beschützen willst. Ich hab als ich das geschrieben hatte gerade den Song gehört und die Zeile hat einfach gepasst. Und hier, meine Liebe, kommen deine Drogen

Chapter 12:

Why am I afraid?

Rory really enjoyed being with Finn. Of course, shopping with him had again been bad. If she would believe in god, she would think it was punishment for her sins. On the other side, he was a saviour. He had been so amazing the first days after the divorce, it would be unbelievable for everyone, who had known him in college. He had brought her coffee, he had put together everything for her bedroom – Luke had been the one, who had finished it in the end, after Finn had two blue fingers and a cut in his left hand, but it was the thought that counted -, he had basically done everything to make her happy. When Rory lay in bed this night, after a day of shopping and the beach, she thought of all those things. Finn next to her had fallen asleep a while ago, he even snored softly. She didn’t know exactly, why she had begun to think about it now, but now she wrapped her mind around the past time, not only the weeks but also the years, that they had spent together by now. They had gone from two people, who had just known each other because of her boyfriend, to friends and finally to people, who shared everything with each other, who knew what the other was thinking, feeling and what the other needed. She had gotten to know a completely different side of the Australian and she had learned to rely on him. When she thought of it now, her whole life somehow had been build entirely on him for the last years and in some way this scared her now. He knew all of her secrets, simply everything about her and no one had ever known those things except for her mother and maybe Lane, but she wasn’t so sure about that one.
“Why?” she whispered. The word flood around in the dark room getting no answer. Why did she let this man get so close to her? Why did she think about this now? And why did that fact scare the crap out of her now? She didn’t have answers for those questions, but she knew she wasn’t afraid of her feelings for Finn. She was afraid, that he would someday use one of those things against her and let her down. She was afraid to get hurt by the one person she knew of, that he would rather die than ever hurt her. But why?
“Why aren’t you sleeping, kitten?” was she snapped out of her thoughts by the voice of said guy.
“I couldn’t sleep. There are so many things, that I need to wrap my mind around.”
“Tell me one of those things” he was sleepy, but still she was the first thing on his mind. Rory just shook her head. She couldn’t tell Finn, what she had been thinking about, but she couldn’t lie to him either.
“Just tell me love, it can’t be that bad.” She closed her eyes for a moment, before she sighed and decided to tell him.
“I thought about you and me.”
“Why’s that?”
“I don’t know. It just came to me and I suddenly realized how close we really are. I think, I’m afraid, Finn.”
“Why are you afraid?” He sat next to her by now, looking at her with curiosity in his eyes – and something she couldn’t quite read.
“I know I shouldn’t be. I feel stupid, you know? But I’m afraid, that you will hurt me somehow, that you will let me down.” She didn’t look into his eyes, so she couldn’t see how they softened at her words.
“Come here” he said and she crawled into his arms.
“It’s not stupid, love, don’t think that. I understand, really. There were many guys in your life, who let you down. Your father, who had never really been in your life; Jess, who just disappeared; Logan and even Dean somehow. They were all close to you and they all let you down. But you need to believe me something. I promise, no I swear not to ever let you down. I won’t hurt you, Rory. Rather I’d jump from one of those crazy high skyscrapers they have in China or Japan, than ever hurt you. I’ve seen you hurt and I just couldn’t live with it.” Rory’s eyes had started to water with his words and she hugged him.
“I love you, Finny.”
“I know, kitten. We should go back to sleep now.” With that he kissed her temple and crawled back under the covers. Rory watched for a few minutes before she did the same. She didn’t know, why she had been afraid anymore. She was so lucky to have such a caring best friend.

Nun, es ist zumindest ein "I love you" drin ...

Liebe Grüße, Susu